SOS – Vanilla (Untouched, Plugin-Free) Installation Crashing

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I'm getting the message "There has been a critical error on this website" on a vanilla, out-of-the-box download of WordPress. The setup-config.php won't even load.

Running Apache+Php+MariaDB on Windows Server 2019, on a Dell PowerEdge R630, inside VMWare Workstation Pro (6 vCPU / 24GB RAM).

I'm lost here as to why this would happen.

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2 Comments
  1. Slap that guy into debug

    define( ‘WP_DEBUG’, true );
    define( ‘WP_DEBUG_LOG’, true );

 

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